Chinasia

After Bangkok, we fly south and I have a few day stop over on an island called Kho Phangan. This island is known for its crazy parties on the full moon, which happened to fit into our schedule. We arrived a few days prior because the rooms often fill up quick and I get partied-out a few days too early. I decide to leave before the full moon shabang. A boat carried me to my current location of Koh Tao - an island known for its cheap scuba diving courses and beautiful dive sites. How many opportunities do you get to dive for really cheap? A few days after arriving, I am now a PADI certified diver and have come to understand myself a bit better: I am part fish.

Reasons I am part fish:
- was one of the quicker scuba learners in my instructor's 6 years of teaching

- my nitrogen narcosis mind-clarity test proved I think more quickly while at depth

- I find that temporarily being without a mask and regulator while 18 meters underwater is actually enjoyable.

- I am either a step forward or backward in evolutionary process. In any case, as seen in the picture below, this seals the deal.

Part of my elective courses was underwater photography, which is why I was able to get these pics. I also posted some more on my yahoo photo album:
http://pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/spainsharp/album?.dir=/f1c8scd

Bangkok held a lot of new things. Most people treat it as a mere stop over, but there was much more to be explored. For the sake of time, I will limit my explanation to one story. There is a place notorious for sleeze and sexual confusion called Nana Plaza. Three floors of neon lit bars with a bar-filled courtyard in the middle. Approaching one of these colorful bars we were greeted by a hefty ladyboy ('ladyboy' defined: once a man, decided to switch, may or may not have had an operation to 'complete the transformation'), hugs and all. We laugh as she tries to coax us into his/her bar "only to look, no charge". I figure that I've got nothing to lose and cave after a few minutes. With the hefty ladyboy's arm over my shoulder (not by choice really), I pass through the curtain being held open at the entrance. No fewer than 5 beautiful bikini clad women stand right inside the door, with tons more dancing around on elevated stages. This is what is known as a go-go bar. I stood just a few feet from the entrance after deciding that going any further might jeopardize an exit. The beautiful bodies gather around and proceed to bombard me with typical 'working women' one liners like "war yew fram?" and "wach yew nam?". With a smile, I politely answer a few of their questions. It didn't take too long before these friendly young ladies got a bit more bold. Multiple sets of unusually large women's hands were reaching for the middle section of my shorts. Batting their hands away didn't seem to discourage them, and a few break my shield momentarily. It was time to leave. With a wave and an "adios" I turned around and walked back through the curtain which I had entered only a minute before. Just outside was an Omanian (from Oman) sitting at a bar. He sees me lightly laughing and it is obvious he knows what has just happened. His english is good and we chat for a while. I learn that the particular bar I was just in, the one full of beautiful women, didn't technically have any women in it. Yep, 100% ladyboys. I don't know what messed with my head more, the fact that sex changes are so commonplace and accepted, or the fact that I found some of the final products quite attractive. The picture below is one of the many sexually deceptive 'working people'.

Quick catch-up:
Naha, Okinawa - 4 days
- spend days wandering around Koksai street and the nights drinking with gaijins (foreigners) at Paul & Mike's bar. Meet an energetic and friendly Kiwi named Whiri who I unsuccesfully play wingman to during a late night at a salsa club.
- Our hotel room bathroom was smaller than those found on most airplanes.

Ishigaki island - 4 days
- arrive by boat boat from Naha (15 hours)
- bike most of the way around the island, the final two hours of which were done in the dark. Our path took us through an unlit 1 mile tunnel with barely any shoulder. The first time in a long while that I have been a bit scared.

Iriomote island - 5 days
- arrive by boat from Ishigaki (1 very bumpy hour)
- a friend at our hostel takes us out to dinner with her dive-shop owning uncle. The next day is spent snorkeling and scuba diving in between tanning sessions on his boat. The most mellow I have been in a long time.
- Learn the japanese game Go with Charles and play card games with the hostel staff till late at night. The japanese guests turn bright glowing red as they get drunk off massive bottles of awamori (okinawa's special sake liquor) every night.

Taipei, Taiwan - 1 night
- arrive via ferry (7 hours)
- go out on the town immediately upon arrival. Going on the advice of a Taiwanese friend we checked out the night markets and head to a few clubs. One refused to allow us in because my flip-flops didn't have a strap on the heel, so Charles rigged it up with tape and some cute ornaments. If it wasn't for their id policy (and us not having any) they would have let us in with a laugh.

Bangkok, Thailand - 7 days so far
- arrive via flight from Taipei (3.5 hours)
- staying on Khaosan road, hub for all backpackers going to or from southeast asia. Things are cheap and the food is good.

From Tokyo, we continued to the west by rail to Kyoto. Much easier to get a feel for than Tokyo, this town still had quite a bit to offer. Hills surround much of the city and at the foot of many of these hills are temples, lots of temples. They are all beautiful and have historical significance, but after a while they start to look alike and the tourists start to get annoying (glad I`m not one of them). Not to mention there are subtle respectful ways to act that are sometimes hard to pick up on, like not washing your feet and dunking your head in the holy spring water. I had no idea of the water`s spiritual standing until after my public bathing session when one unhappy local said something. I felt bad, but the damage was done. Looking back on it, a bit of comedy may have lightened up the situation. Heres how a humorous culturally insensitive dialogue could have gone:

-lady: excuse me, excuse me sir. That is holy water. Not for washing. You cannot step in the water.

-me: holy water? you don`t say? No wonder my feet feel so good. Does anyone else feel like dancing? Because I got my dancin` feet right now. Woah!

So far, the only hint of bad spiritual karma came in the form of little paper fortunes I got at one of the other temples. Here is how it works:
- put 100￥ in the little slot, this is based on the honor system. I would imagine `stealing` a fortune wouldn`t bode so well in a superstitious society
- shake the shiny metal box to your heart`s content, and shake one of the sticks out of the small metal hole.
- match the symbol on the stick with the drawer that contains your fortune.

My first one, labeled "Better Fortune" starts off "The moon is covered by floating clouds. You will have difficulties in making any plans" and just got better from there. Dissatisfied, I make another 100￥ investment. My second fortune, labeled "Good Fortune" is a bit more fitting i think, "Be careful in what you say when you are drinking." A good piece of sound advice, but definitely not a fortune to get excited about. To make it worse, while I`m getting drinking advice, my brother was getting words along the lines of, "its only a matter of time before you take over the world", "everyone wants to be like you", or simply "you`re the man" (not verbatum of course). Guess the holy water incident did me in.

While I may have been a bit insensitive to Kyoto, Kyoto was not excessively welcoming at certain times either. A bit of background info first. When you go out in a major Japanese city, the theme seems to be find the smallest bar possible. There are an infinite number of tiny bars on any given street in the nightlife areas. Which means many of them are tucked away in alleys or upstairs. Half the fun is trying to find the most hidden ones. In my brother and I`s curiousity about bars one night, we found our way through an alley to a hotel of sorts. Just for the hell of it, we decided to walk in and see what the place was like. Up a flight of stairs to the hotel lobby. Only there was no check-in desk, no receptionist. Only a large LCD TV, one smaller, touch-screen monitor, and a credit-card swipe machine. both monitors displayed the rooms that were available. i had nothing to lose in investigating, so I selected one of the available rooms. A list of prices for either 30 minutes, 60 minutes, 2 hours, or the whole night came up on the screen. It was just about then that the metal shudder on a nearby window raised just a crack and a sign in english was being held out by a hand. I guess someone had noticed us on a security camera. I paused my fun room search to go read the sign. It read, "NO SAME SEX COUPLES". Apparently my brother and I were a couple. We laughed our way back down the stairs to go have another beer.

Lesson of the Day: The Japanese are masters of technology

1. Vending machines seem more numerous and sometimes more intelligent than people. Machines selling everything from soda pop to beer and cigarettes are nearly always within eyeshot, most often in large clusters. Need a quick hot snack? Maybe some french fries or soba noodles? Pop a few hundred yen into the slot, wait 40 seconds while it heats up your boxed goodie, and out it comes chop-sticks and all. In some cases, you can even pay with the swipe of your cell phone over a sensor. Extreme convenience, extreme ingenuity, everyday japan.

2. Nothing bugs me more than having to use the bathroom while in my time machine. Thank God the Japanese made the Time-travel toilet. It comes standard with Dual-flush action, directional water-jet cleaning spray, heated seat, noise-masking tunes, 6-CD disc changer*, child-proof door locks*, and cruise control*. You need a PhD just to work one of these contraptions.
(* denotes obvious fiction)

3. When it comes to spatial awareness video games, the Japanese take the cake. Those of you who know what DDR (Dance Dance Revolution) is may also very well know that asian kids make the hardest game setting seem like childs play. The game in the picture above also involves spatial awareness, thus is dominated by Japanese kids in arcades. Needless to say, I had a poor showing.

Although the following link was filmed by someone else a long time ago, it is an extreme version of what I have witnessed in Japanese kids playing the same game as in the picture above. The film wasn`t sped-up according to the source:
http://ebaumsworld.com/2006/07/asianarcade.html

Went even closer than in the pic to touching this thing with my finger. Interesting factoid learned from a Japanese woman when I showed her the picture: some people die from getting stung by this bee.

It seems fitting that last night my brother and I saw Pirates of the Carribean and today we are leaving on a 20 hour voyage aboard a seaworthy vessel to Okinawa. Nothing can make a man feel alive like the smell of the salty sea breeze filling your nostrils and sun smothering your skin in a blazing hot light as it reflects off the water. Then again, maybe not. We`ll see how I feel at about hour 15. Perhaps something that may play a role in the planning of our next couple days:
http://severe.worldweather.org/tc/wnp/

Quite a bit to catch up on, many miles put under my feet since the first post. Here's the basic travel history:

- land in Beijing, China after a 13 hour flight from Chicago. Spend a few days milling around the city getting strange looks from people because of my beatiful blonde hair and blue eyes. Random people ask my brother and sister if they will pose for a picture with them, but for some reason yours truly is too dashingly attractive to be considered. This reoccurs multiple times a day during our stay in Beijing. Its so rediculous I decide to start taking pictures of other people for no reason just to return the favor.

Everything in China is dirt cheap. In Beijing my sister and I visited the Pearl Market. Delightfully surprising fact about the pearl market: most of what is on sale isn't pearls. Knock-offs of every brand, size, and shape in addition to cheap nik-nack goods can be found in this 7-story treasure trove. I spend most of my time bargaining with an electronics vendor over the price of an "ipod" and an MP3 usb key. Both of which were acquired for less than a quarter of what the equivalent would be in the states. I was a kid in a candy shop. I didn't even leave the first floor for most of our visit. When we finally did leave, we took a $2-$3 cab ride across town back to our hotel. The dollar-Yuan conversion made it feel like a game of monopoly where I was the banker and my opponents were all blind 5-year old deaf children (translation: dollars go a long way). Doing my part to boost their economy and enjoying every minute of it.

(ipod nanos? nah, their resemblance is accidental I'm sure)

(This energetic fellow's stand had quite the military gear selection. Night vision for around $100? The only catch is its hard to test it out)

- A few days later we fly from Beijing to Xian (pronounced shy-anne) to check out the Taracotta Soldiers. Apparently we had booked a tour guide along with our transportation who spoke english like a text-to-speech program on a computer. The soldiers were somewhat impressive, but I spent most of the time wishing I could jump over the rail and down into the pit and see how long it would take the guards to subdue me. That would have been a killer photo op for all those stupid tourists filming every minute of their investment. Truth: many people are so busy documenting their experiences that they don't actually have the experience at all.

(taracotta soldiers - don't let the zoom fool you, we were kept at a distance)

- With jet-lag in recession, the first real night out on the Chinese town becomes possible. Xian is alive with lots of hustle and bustle. We kick off the night at a recently-opened bar. I expected the chinese to have a hard time letting loose, but this night quickly dispelled that myth. After I get a couple Tsing-Tao's (the choice chinese beer) in me I proceed to bust a move with the hired dancers. Which brings me to the first of two lessons from the night: the universal language of dance brings people together like none other. The second lesson, which was a puzzle to me when my brother first said it is, "just go with it." These words of wisdom came out of his mouth after returning from a bathroom break. Intrigued by the smirk on his face, I decided before we left that I must investigate. All seems to be in order as I enter the bathroom: the place is extremely dirty and it smells like someone pissed on every possible exposed surface. There is an attendant standing near the sink, which is not unusual in a country where the employment motto seems to be, "why not hire two workers for a job that only needs one." He says hello and proceeds to escort me over to a urinal. A little weird, but hey, some guys are just enthusiastic about their job. I turn to the urinal and get ready to do my business. Mid-way through the unzip stage I notice he is still standing next to me. I think, "maybe if I ignore him he'll go away." Sure enough, after a few seconds he disappears out of my peripheral vision and I give the green light for my body to do its thing. Just when relief is on the way, I feel two hands on my shoulders. Is this dude gay? what the hell was he doing? Just me and this attendant in the bathroom, and he is giving me a shoulder massage while I'm hanging out. All became clear when the wise words of my brother echoed in my mind, "just go with it." A giddy smile covered my face. I did my best to play along and act like I enjoyed it. "Yep, thats great...yeah, right there, yep, I'm good," were the words I spoke only to keep from laughing out loud. Not a drop, but at least my shoulders felt great. Upon exiting the bathroom, I immediately caught the eyes of my brother, both of us grinning from having independently shared such a life changing experience.

(The speaker of wisdom with a pagoda in the background)

- From Xian, it was off to Shanghai. This city is populated by over 6 million people. The skyline goes on forever and the buildings are out of a science fiction film. One skyscraper is the equivalent of a computer monitor, one city block x one city block with video advertisements playing on it. Very impressive, but the city is a bit much to try and swallow in only a few days.

- The next leg is where I find myself now, Tokyo, Japan. The days of feeling like a king with the powerful dollar are over. Things are very clean and the city feels safe enough to walk around without wondering whether or not you should hide your wallet in your underwear. The four letter word of the day is fish. Everything edible contains fish. Fish when you wake up, fish when you go to bed, and fish cookies with fish broth when you wake up and need a midnight snack. Now I'm all about trying new things. Sushi, sashimi, caviar, eel, octopus, seaweed, or whatever is a great thing in moderation. But when things that shouldn't taste like fish have that fishy smell and slight fishy taste, I find myself yearning for a burger and fries. It gets you when you're not looking too. "oh, whats this? this looks like broiled chicken. Is that a cookie wafer over there? Finally, some familiar pumpkin soup." And then, BAM! A trojan horse attacks your mouth with a fury whose closest relative would be a spoon full of wasabi, but with more gag reflex and less crying. At least I can wash all those unenjoyable experieces down with a tall glass of Sapporo beer, which I may unfortunatly be conditioning myself to associate with fishiness.

I'll post some pictures with this entry after a while, but until then, I look the same, just a bit skinnier.

Destination: China, Japan, etc.
Departure: July 17, 2006
Duration of travels: 5 months mas o menos

My suitcase is as empty as my mind is full. I plan on having plenty of time to pack on account of being too anxious to sleep tonight. Nervous? Nah. Its more like the feeling you used to get when you tried to fall asleep on Christmas Eve, but better. GI Joe with the kung-fu grip broke after a week, but what waits for me tomorrow morning is the beginning of a long string of who knows what. Far from the comfort and predictability of home. English teacher, japanese wedding minister, political prisoner, random tourist. Anything is in the cards and I'm ready to gamble.

For all of you out there who I haven't shown this to yet, it is probably the most useful invention since contraceptives. Yeah, that is a bottle opener built into the bottom of my flip-flop. Genius. I would be crazy to leave these bad boys behind.

Since this blog site limits my photo uploads, you can find more of my photos at:

http://pg.photos.yahoo.com/ph/spainsharp/my_photos

More to come when I actually have things to write about.